Week 22 - The Election!

I have no epitaph that relates to my weight loss journey.  The big news for this week was/is the election of President Barak Obama to a second term.  I am very happy.  I know he is the best man for the job.

Now, to the stats.

Stats:  -1lb
Avg calories expended:  2428
Avg calories consumed: 1229

Positives:

• Achieved my other weekly goals:
• Logged all my meals
• No alcohol
• New exercise schedule
• Finally went down a size. 

In general, it was a good week.  I'm happy to have lost another pound vs. gaining or staying the same, but I still would have liked to have lost more, even .5, just to get ahead of the goal.  But, when I think about the week I had, I should be grateful.  I stayed within the numbers, but I ended up eating a lot of junk food.  It started last Saturday with a pizza party - my favorite all time pizza from Tony & Ann's - birthday party for my brother and sister.  I made Dark Chocolate Cupcakes with Peanut butter frosting.  The batter and frosting sampling was out of control.  And, of course, I had to try one!  That should have been enough, but oh no.  We had left over pizza, and I couldn't resist. I really need to do something about my will power or lack of it.  I spent the rest of the week trying to get back on track, and I guess I balanced things out, but I think I started a sugar craving, because I broke down and had a coffee roll from Dunkin' Donuts on Thursday.  Honestly, the calories are the same as when I get my multigrain bagel, but of course there is all that sugar and fat :-(

I was able to get into some pants that are a size smaller than I was wearing.  It has taken 22 weeks!  But, that is because I was probably squeezing into a size that should have been at least one larger.  I think going down to the next lower size will not take as long.  Maybe half the time?  10 weeks - I'm going to hope that 10 weeks = 10 lbs, and that will translate into a smaller size.  For now, I've been able to go into my own closet and find clothes that are a lower size from when I was smaller.  I don't want to have to buy anything until I'm my final size.

I started my new exercise routine.  I currently have 3 days where I only walk for 45 minutes, then I spend 15-20 minutes on isometric exercises, preferably with weights.  I was concerned that I would drop significantly in calorie expenditure.  My monitor definitely does not register my isometric exercises as physical activity, which is crazy, because I'm certainly more active, but whatever.

I think I am going to take Monday off from exercise completely.  I know I will sleep in - the kids don't have school, and I'm working from home, so it's a good opportunity to ignore the alarm.  It's supposed to be a nice day, though, so I'd like to go out for a walk.  It will be the first day in 12 that I haven't worked out.  But, I'm thinking it may be good to take a complete day off every couple of weeks.

Week 21 - 10%

Stats:  4lb loss
Average calorie output:  2457
Total Weight Loss:  22lb

Positives:

• Made my 10% goal finally
• Turn back the clocks tonight!!!  I cannot wait to get my hour back.
• Average of 2457!! And that is with taking a full and complete day off from working out.

Ok, and now here is for the venting of everything else.  Of course I was still a little disappointed that my 5.5 loss didn't stick around, but I'm trying to look on the bright side that maybe I won't gain back any of this 4, where as if I had weighed in at 5.5, I surely would have had a gain back of 1.5 or more by next Friday.  Still - only being 1lb ahead of my weekly goal doesn't exactly make me breath a sigh of relief.

So, changes for this week - I am really going to try to go back to logging my food.  I have to admit that I know my food intake was not good this week.  We had the hurricane Sandy on Monday, and I worked from home on Monday and Tuesday, and it is just harder to be good when I am at home.  Also, Wednesday was Halloween, and I make our traditional Halloween sugar cookies with butter cream frosting - I must have licked and tasted 1/2 cup of frosting, not to mention that I ate 3 cookies!  On Halloween, I had 3 fun size candy bars.  In all, it could have been a lot worse, but I wonder if I had put those into my food tracker if I would have continued to be so bad!  So, I will go back to tracking and see if I can't make more of a dent into my progress.

Today I knew I was having my family over for pizza for a birthday celebration, so I was extra careful all through the day.  I made chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter frosting for the dessert, and I really wanted to try one, so I did.  I just logged my day, and it's coming out as 1374, so not too bad if that is 100% accurate, which it probably is not - maybe 1500?  Which isn't horrible.

The other think I am going to start is to incorporate more weight work into my work outs.  This will be hard only because of giving up my current calorie burn.  I feel like I just finally started making good progress on getting above 2200 a day, and now I will be cutting back - I know that the weight work does burn calories (even though the monitor doesn't seem to show it), and overall, if I boost my muscle, I will be burning more all over, but it will still be hard to see the number come down.

I found my last weigh-loss spreadsheet on my computer.  I don't remember it well, but it looks like the last time I had seriously tried to lose weight was in 2010.  I started in January, and I started at at least 5 pounds heavier than I was when I started my current effort.  I have entries for 21 weeks - exactly where I am at in my current journey, and I had lost a total of 23 pounds!  One pound more than I have so far.  It's sort of depressing to see that.  I don't remember what happened - why did I start slacking off at that point?  I have one more entry in my calorie count at the beginning of June, but there isn't another one until November, and by then I've gained back 6 pounds.  Why did I quit?  I do remember that Chuck and I went to Montreal with Dawna and George that Memorial Day weekend.  I have pictures of us, and it is so not pretty.  I look horrible.  Yes, 5 pounds heavier than I am now at the same point, and 5# is a lot, but it's not that much of a difference.  I guess it's humbled me.  Here I am thinking and feeling like I look GREAT now that I've lost 22lb, but I can see that I still look like a shlub (is that a word?).  I feel like I'm working harder at this than I have the last 3 times (I found a 2011 log - only 3 entries long, and then there was 2010, and before that I have 2008, which was fairly successful - made it to about the exact same spot - down 22lb), I know I never have worked out for 7 days a week or at least 7x a week, I always espoused a day of rest.  

Well, this is getting very long.  I should sign off and go to bed so I can enjoy my extra hour of sleep and get up and do my first workout of my new regime.  I will persevere.  I will not let the 22/23 pound curse get to me again!  I will continue no matter what and get to my goal, and this blog is here to remind me.

Sneak Peek!

Ok, I never do a mid-week post, but I just had to document this somehow.  When I got on the scale this morning, I was down 5.5lbs!  I know, I know - it's not official until I step on the scale tomorrow, and I quite possibly could be 2# heavier tomorrow (who knows why?), which would just put me exactly where I belong.  However, it was just thrilling to see that number on the scale, and I've been trying to be extra good all day so that I can't blame myself tomorrow if most of the loss vanishes.

It gives me hope, though, that at least I'll be down the 3# that I need to be.  And maybe the not drinking is working.  I do sort of have a pattern of a big loss following the week that I have my period, so maybe that is all this is.  And, unfortunately, I also have a pattern of gaining back half or more of that big loss :-(  But, I'll try not to pay interest on money I haven't borrowed, and I'll just be happy that it appears that I'm making progress!!!

Week 20 - The Worst Month Ever

Well, not exactly ever, but it's the worst month since my very first month, and that wasn't even a full month.

Stats:  -.5
Ave cal expenditure: 2311

Ok, before I launch into all the negativity, I'm going to focus on the positive:

• this week three people asked me if I have lost weight
• fat % showed as 34% at weigh-in
• three weeks of not drinking alcohol
• worked out 7 out of 7 days.

So, all that's good.  I'm happy that I didn't gain, but I am really bummed that 1)  I still didn't make my 10% goal (2 weeks off now), 2) I didn't lose more weight.  Total weight loss for October (this is the last WI of the month - 4 total) is 1.5lb  this ties for the lowest monthly loss since the first month. I have lost 5# a month the other months.  Now this.

A couple of weeks ago, I talked about realizing that this weight number is one I've gotten stuck on in the past. Despite this self awareness, I was really not prepared for this lack of progress.  I feel like, based on the work I am doing, I really should not be having a problem losing 1 pound a week - even if it's an average.  My current average is .9.  In order to be back on track for next week, I will have to lose 3 pounds.  Definitely possible - I've had 3# weeks before.  Of course, that's just to catch up.  By now, I was hoping to be ahead of the game a couple pounds.  That's why I quit drinking.  I figure, if I don't see any significant progress by next Friday, I will go off the wagon.  What's the point if it's not going to help in the results.  I'm sure that I have cut calories by not drinking - it factors into decisions that I've made to go out to eat or not, it's kept me from snacking when I had a few glasses of wine in me.  But, OTOH, maybe I'm compensating by consuming more calories anyway to make up for what I usually consume in alcohol.  I haven't been tracking my food.  I just have not had the time.  I can't do it at work because the tool doesn't work on my work laptop.  I don't like to do it on the phone because it takes longer, and when I'm at home, my evenings are already full of cooking, cleaning, homework (mine), and much needed sleep!

Also, I have been sticking to a pretty specific diet, meals that I have entered over and over again, so I know that I'm averaging no more than 1400 calories.  It's leaving me a deficit of ~900 calories a day!  But, if I have another bad/slow progress week, I'll have to make a super-human effort to go back to food tracking.  Maybe I'm severely underestimating my intake.

Week 19 - Desperate Times

Stats:  +.5
Average calories out:  2490

Well, this week's post was supposed to be titled, "Yahoo!  10%!", but it was not to be.  I was there on Thursday, I was under it this morning, but I on Friday morning, somehow I knew I wasn't going to make it.  Have you ever just felt heavy?  That's how I felt when I got on the scale.  Despite the foreboding, I weighed myself three times because I just couldn't believe it.  How could I have gained a pound and a half since the day before?  Sometimes the scale is just a big head game.

So, the desperate times call for desperate measures, and the one I have chosen is to stop drinking alcohol until Thanksgiving.  My last drink was on 10/5, so I have had two weigh-ins since I stopped, one good, and one not so good.  I will have to evaluate if it's really worth it to not drink.  My hope is that I could really make a dent in my weight-loss goals (be ahead a few pounds - I'd be happy with 2# at this point) before the holidays.

I sometimes think that it's a very good thing that I set my expectations so low.  I know that sounds horrible, but realistically, with the amount of daily deficit I am creating, I should be losing 2# a week, and that's what I've had as a goal in the past, but when I would not lose that, and even gain, I would get so discouraged that I would quit.  Having the 1# goal has meant that (until now), I have been able to even out the big losses and the gains to have an average (ok, so that average has been under 1# more weeks than it has been at or above!) at or near 1#.  To be behind again - and especially not make my 10% goal, is discouraging.  I am putting a lot of work into this.  I am tired all the time because I'm getting up at 5 AM to work out.  I'm working out every day, sometimes twice a day.  I am sacrificing - not just alcohol, but sweets, food, etc.  If I can't show at least 1# a week average loss, then I think there is something seriously wrong with me and my metabolism.

Week 18 - Small Victories

Stats:  Lost 4.5lbs this week.

Don't ask me to figure it out.  I have no idea.  I was thrilled to be back on track with my goal of 1# a week, but my body just confounds me.  I am thrown off balance - I don't know what is working and what is not since there is such a see-saw ride on the scale.

Last week's post was so short because I was short on time, but after the big gain, I tried to focus on other areas of victory.  I mean, my clothes are definitely fitting better.  When I see my silhouette reflected in glass or the mirror, I don't cringe like I used to.  I know that I have a long way to go, but it is nice to be able to see the results of all hard work.

I also have seen some progress in my fat %.  It has read as low as 35% sometimes, with 37% being the highest I usually see.  This is a good trend, once I get my fat % less than 35, I should be able to burn more calories (or at least as much) at a lower weight.

When I was trying to make sense of my weight gain, I remembered that the last time I tried to lose weight, I was around this same weight, and it was really stubborn.  I ended up getting frustrated because I was up one week and down the next, with very little net progress.   I think I'm in for that again - it's going to be a stubborn set point, but if I can get past it, I should be ok.

I just wish I was a few pounds ahead of my goal instead of being right on.  It gives me no wiggle room, so I figure that I just have to cut back even more, be more careful about what I am eating, and stop drinking.  I decided I am going to quit drinking until Thanksgiving.  At first, I thought it should be a piece of cake - I don't have any major outings planned between now and then, but even last night (Friday night), I was really wanting a glass of wine or even to go out for a drink.  It's going to be more difficult than I thought.  But, I do believe it will make a dent - and maybe get me past this stubborn set point and beyond.  It will be the beginning of the holiday season, so it would be good to be ahead before all that eating and drinking starts.

Week 17 - Time to get serious

Stats:  Gained 3lb!

That says it all, right?

I don't have much time, so this is going to be a quick post.  I really don't know what is going on.  I had a good week with some of the highest average calorie output that I have had.  What it makes me realize is that I need to try even harder/more.